6 Things That Aren’t Helpful to Say to Someone with Type 2 Diabetes – Healthline

We arent looking for you to solve our issues or do medical research. We just want your friendship, love, and compassion.

When I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, I carefully chose how to share this news. In a world where type 2 is looked at strictly as a lifestyle disease, sharing my diagnosis was not something I was looking forward to.

Once it became common knowledge, well-intentioned family and friends started offering unsolicited advice and sharing anecdotes that werent warmly received. What was supposed to come across as caring and interested came across as condescending and rude.

Now, in the age of social media, well-meaning strangers have joined the discussion.

Type 2 diabetes is a very individual and complicated chronic condition. The world tends to minimize diabetes management by focusing only on weight loss, diet, and exercise.

The reality is, so much more affects our numbers: stress, weather, medications, mental health, illness, sleep, and what color socks were wearing. (OK, that last one is a joke. But in all seriousness, it seems everything can impact our blood sugar levels.)

No matter the intentions behind your advice, please think twice before saying any of the following to a person living with type 2 diabetes.

If someone close to you confides in you about their diagnosis or medication side effects, listen with compassion without thinking about what youre going to say next and without trying to solve anything.

While weight loss can certainly help lower blood glucose in people with diabetes, it is not a cure.

Any sentence that starts with just trivializes the complex nature of glucose control. Just watch what you eat, just count carbs, and just exercise are other statements that fall into this category.

If it were just that easy, the millions of people living with type 2 diabetes would have done it already.

There are so many shakes, supplements, and magic potions specifically targeted to people with diabetes.

Someone once told me if I drank okra water daily, it would cure me. First, yuck, and second, if there was a miracle cure out there, the whole world would be talking about it.

We know that real progress is based on sustainable lifestyle changes. Please dont try to sell us on a quick fix you read about on social media.

First, every persons diabetes is different. So, your grandmothers diabetes is not my diabetes.

Most patients with a type 2 diagnosis are well aware of the complications that may arise as a result of the condition. Some may even use this knowledge as a motivator to eat well, take their medications as advised, and exercise more.

Hearing secondhand stories like this can take that motivation and turn it into fear, causing us to live in a constant state of anxiety. We know the realities that come with this disease and are trying our best to stay positive and control the things we can, like how we eat, how we move, how we think, and how we react to others.

This statement is harmful for so many reasons, and Im not even sure I understand the intent. Is it to make us feel better by comparing our chronic condition to someones cancer battle?

Its never OK to minimize a persons feelings by saying it can always be worse. This goes for pretty much any scenario in life, but medical conditions especially.

Theres a misconception that type 2 diabetes can be cured or reversed using a specific diet or by losing a significant amount of weight. Diabetes remission can be achieved by some, but not everyone is able to completely get off medication, even if they are doing everything right.

Implying that a loved one (or stranger) must not be trying hard enough because they need medication only serves a healthy helping of shame and guilt, emotions they may already feel due to the pressure they put on themselves.

I saved the best and most frustrating for last. Every person I know who is living with diabetes has had this sentence said to them.

Living with type 2 diabetes is a 24/7 job. We are always thinking about food and the way our bodies are going to react to our choices. But that doesnt mean we need policing.

Being a grown woman with type 2 diabetes does not mean I should never enjoy a tasty treat. Its likely if Im eating something indulgent, Ive planned for it, and am excited about it.

The food police comments may be made with genuine concern, but to the person living with type 2, they only serve as a vehicle to shame us for our choices under the guise of being worried about our health.

A type 2 diabetes diagnosis can be difficult to navigate. We want support from our friends and family without unsolicited advice.

When were sharing our frustrations and emotions, we need two things from you: a safe place and open ears.

We arent looking for you to solve our issues or do medical research. We just want your friendship, love, and compassion.

Remember, were given two ears and just one mouth for a reason so we can listen twice as much as we talk.

Mary Van Doorn lives in Georgia with her husband, their two kids, three dogs, and three cats. Shes a type 2 diabetes advocate and the founder of Sugar Mama Strong and Sugar Mama Strong Diabetes Support. When shes not taking care of the kids, the house, or the zoo, you can find her binge-watching her favorite shows: Greys Anatomy, This Is Us, and A Million Little Things.

Originally posted here:
6 Things That Aren't Helpful to Say to Someone with Type 2 Diabetes - Healthline