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When P-I-G-S fly: Cam, Kalil, and the art of Panthers indoor silliness … – Durham Herald Sun (blog)

Posted: August 18, 2017 at 10:40 am

Would you like to be known as king of the pigs?

For the Carolina Panthers, this is a true honor. The pig in question is P-I-G, a shortened form of the backyard basketball game of H-O-R-S-E. The tournament in question is a 32-player bracket carefully written out on a piece of cardboard and played indoors with a toy basketball, a miniature hoop and an abundance of testosterone.

P-I-G commissioner Ryan Kalil also the Panthers five-time Pro Bowl center rules the league, seeds the bracket from 1-32 and has the final say on all of the many controversies.

The biggest story in the run-up to this years still-in-progress tournament has concerned the absence of quarterback Cam Newton, a previous P-I-G champion and noted pot-stirrer who took exception to some of Kalils many rules and decided not to enter.

He wanted me to beg him to get in, a chortling Kalil said of Newton, and I wouldnt do it.

I asked linebacker Thomas Davis P-I-G champion in 2015, a finalist in 2016 and the No. 1 seed in the 2017 bracket about Newtons reputation for rule-bending in the tournament.

Yeah, hes a big cheater, Davis said, laughing. Thats why were happy hes not in it.

Added Kalil of Newton: Thats one of the reasons I took it public this year, to show him that the league goes on without him.

Kalil has this year decided for the first time pulled back the curtain on the P-I-G tournament, which has been a diversion in the Panthers locker room for about a decade now.

The games originator and commissioner was former Panthers offensive tackle Jordan Gross, and Gross still serves as an unpaid consultant to Kalil on all rules disputes.

Most of the rules are in place to protect everybody and make it fair, Kalil said. I get being (NFL commissioner) Roger Goodell. ... You cant please everybody. You do what you think is best and somebody is not going to be happy.

If you think a game like this would not need many rules, you would be dead wrong. Kalil gave me only a sampling, and he kept thinking of others as we talked.

No dunks, Kalil said. And no jumping. In the past, we had guys who were more athletic than others doing some really crazy stuff. They felt like I changed the rules to make it more fair for the offensive and defensive linemen. But in fact I didnt want to have to explain to Coach why a guy rolled an ankle or something, so I banned it all. Its called too athletic. (Newton did not agree with this rule). So any shots called too athletic are completely banned.

Carolina Panthers center Ryan Kalil (67) said that contrary to what some teammates think the too athletic rule banning certain shots in his P-I-G tournament was not put in place simply to benefit the other offensive linemen who play alongside Kalil.

Jeff Siner jsiner@charlotteobserver.com

The point in P-I-G, of course, is not to get any letters and to make your opponent spell out the word first by missing three shots that you made. The player who gets to shoot first used to be determined by a 2-out-of-3 rock-paper-scissors contest. But in the interest of speeding up the game, the higher seed now always gets that right.

Kalil also reserves the commissioners power to hand out additional penalty letters to anyone showing poor sportsmanship or delaying the game.

If you miss a shot and out of anger you spike the ball or you toss it on the ground where somebody else has to go pick it up? Kalil said. Thats an automatic letter for you. Also, say you do a shot and then I have to match your shot and I miss. And then I catch the ball and do another practice shot? Automatic letter. Theres no extra practicing.

Any player who goes on injured reserve is also knocked out of the tournament, Kalil said. This may seem heartless, but Kalil said it is only because that players schedule no longer gives him the same break time as the others.

Thus, safety Dean Marlowe won his first-round matchup but then was disqualified for the rest of the 2017 tournament because he was recently placed on IR with his hamstring injury.

Carolina Panthers linebacker Luke Kuechly (left) found his way back into the P-I-G tournament run by center Ryan Kalil (67) when his toy horse won the Spartanburg Derby. Kuechly celebrated as if he had just made a game-winning interception.

Davie Hinshaw dhinshaw@charlotteobserver.com

How to replace him? Kalil decided to use a kids horse-racing game during training camp, where six players would pick a horse and the winner got back in. Linebacker Luke Kuechly won what was christened the Spartanburg Derby, which Kalil also put on social media. Kuechly celebrated his return to the tournament like he had just taken back an interception for a touchdown.

Newton was also a big part of the video Kalil posted for the Spartanburg Derby, and he has been hanging around the game occasionally without playing it. The quarterback teasingly posted on Instagram that Kalil should give the people what they want. This years tourney has NO entertainment or PHENOMS. ... The tourney needs a different marketing strategy.

Newton also told the teams website that his absence has struck a deep blow to every games attendance. Ive been the cash cow for that association for too long, he said.

It is true, Kalil admitted, that Newton as a competitor in any P-I-G game brings more players in to watch. The audience is encouraged to verbally abuse the players competing, but cannot touch them.

Cam doesnt have a lot of trick shots, Kalil said. But, as you can imagine, Cam has a lot of theatrics. So he has one shot where he leans against the wall and does the Saturday Night Live What is Love thing and he says Yeah, yeah, yeah about eight times. Then he does an easy shot. But what happens is you are so distracted by the Yeah, yeah that by the time you get to the easy shot youre so flustered and distracted that you end up missing."

There are controversies inside this years tournament as well. Quarterback Derek Anderson has a signature shot he calls The Dolphin, in which he bounces the ball off his forehead and into the hoop. At 6-foot-6, this shot is a lot easier to make for Anderson than it is for 5-9 cornerback Captain Munnerlyn, who complained it should be illegal.

We ruled in favor of D.A., Kalil said of Anderson. We felt like he was using his body type as an advantage. Captain has to figure out a shot that only a short guy could do.

Kalil is a playing commissioner but always loses quickly. I like to play, he said, but I dont like to win because it becomes very controversial if I go deep. I dont honestly throw any games, but I dont get upset if Im out early.

Last years tournament was won by the now-departed offensive tackle Mike Remmers who was much better at playing P-I-G than he was at blocking Von Miller in the Super Bowl so there will be a new champion this year. The tournament is headed toward the quarterfinals with a change of venue, and Kalil plans to get some games in during the Panthers five-day stay in Nashville this week.

Defensive end Julius Peppers has already been eliminated this year by offensive guard Trai Turner despite the fact Peppers once played in college basketballs Final Four.

Bracket Update!

A post shared by Ryan Kalil (@ryankalil67) on Aug 16, 2017 at 5:42am PDT

Defensive end Charles Johnson is still alive he eliminated a former champion in long snapper J.J. Jansen but believes he has been placed in the toughest part of the bracket.

I took out Duke! Johnson said, speaking of Jansen.

The problem is that North Carolina is still in your bracket, countered Kalil, speaking of Davis.

As for Davis, he exudes confidence and is Kalils pick to win his second championship this season.

Im pretty versatile, said Davis, who in slightly more important news signed a one-year contract extension with the Panthers Tuesday to play actual football. I can make them all.

The linebacker hasnt won the 2017 tournament yet, though. The tournament continues, with the winner taking home the piece of autographed cardboard the bracket has been written on and bragging rights as king of the pigs until next year.

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When P-I-G-S fly: Cam, Kalil, and the art of Panthers indoor silliness ... - Durham Herald Sun (blog)

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For disabled vet, battle rages on as feds deny disability payments – Rapid City Journal

Posted: August 6, 2017 at 5:43 am

For 31-year-old Wayne Swier, a U.S. Army combat veteran who suffered devastating injuries from an improvised explosive device seven years ago in Afghanistan, this summer should have been a season of solace and celebration.

But fate and a federal agency seemed to have conspired to turn it into a nightmare.

Swier is set to marry his sweetheart in a week, and the couple plans to move into a new home near Johnson Siding built by the nonprofit Homes for Our Troops later in August.

By any account, it should be a summer of love for the Stephens High School graduate who spent the better part of two tours with the 101st Airbornes Band of Brothers unit fighting the Taliban in the remote mountainous regions of Afghanistan.

Instead, in May the Social Security Administration deemed him no longer disabled and cut off his monthly disability checks, in a manner as harsh as the way that IED blew off his leg in a small Afghan village in November 2010.

Today, Swier is essentially broke, behind on his rent, his credit cards are maxed out, and just last week, power was cut off to his Box Elder rental home due to nonpayment, meaning he couldnt even recharge his robotic prosthetic leg. Although his electricity has since been restored thanks to Black Hills Energy, the mans problems have not been resolved.

Somehow I was deemed no longer disabled by Social Security, and its been an absolute hellish nightmare, he said last week. I wish I wasnt disabled and that my leg grew back, and that my arm functioned, and that my gonads hadnt been blown off and I no longer needed testosterone shots, and I could hear, and I didnt have PTSD, and that I didnt have a traumatic brain injury," Swier said.

I wish I was magically cured and whole again.

Swiers life changed Nov. 13, 2010, when, according to him, his platoons gung-ho green lieutenant, heading into his first firefight, was too stubborn to heed advice from battle-tested subordinates. Instead of choosing a safer, less obvious route to a school in an Afghan town, the lieutenant ordered the platoon to use the road.

One moment, Swier was a 6-foot-5, 189-pound, physically fit soldier on a mission; the next, he was crumpled on the ground, his body ripped apart by the concussion and shrapnel of an improvised explosive device buried in the road.

The IED blast took his left leg, smashed into his left arm and left side, cleaved his testicles and nearly severed his left ear.

Following that devastating day, Swier spent two years confined to Walter Reed Army Medical Center in Washington, D.C., undergoing surgeries, participating in painful rehabilitation sessions and being fitted with the latest in a high-tech prosthesis he will wear for the rest of his life.

Midway through his rehabilitation at Walter Reed, Swier was fitted with an advanced Otto Bock X2 prosthetic leg made of titanium-carbon fiber and equipped with a microprocessor, a computer that senses his weight distribution and motion. Days later, the disabled vet took his first steps in many months.

It was like what I remembered walking to be like," the soft-spoken Swier recalled in a 2014 interview with the Journal.

But his battle on the homefront didnt end there. Two months after being discharged from Walter Reed and returning to the Black Hills, Swiers computerized leg stopped working and his new battle began with the Veterans Affairs federal agency.

He delivered the prosthesis to the Veterans Administration facilities at Fort Meade in Sturgis. Nearly two months later, when the VA hadnt informed him his prosthetic leg had been fixed, he returned to the federal facility, only to learn that the VA had set the device aside in a storage room and never sent it off for repair.

Frustrated, Swier overnighted the artificial limb to a specialist at Walter Reed who quickly identified the problem and fixed a simple short in a wire. Swier had it back in four days.

Now, the bearded, battle-tested vet is forced to face a new enemy in the form of a federal agency that inexplicably discontinued his $1,600 to $1,800 monthly disability stipend on which he relies, and which he has regularly received since 2011.

Its surreal and overwhelming, Swier said on Thursday. Its not like my leg grew back.

After repeated visits to the Social Security office in Rapid City, which still had not updated his contact information as of last week, Swier and his fiance, Bridget Marshall, a paraprofessional in the Rapid City school system, contacted the offices of U.S. Sen. John Thune and U.S. Rep. Kristi Noem. Both of those congressional offices continue to work on Swiers issue, but he still has not received his disability checks.

Originally told by Social Security workers that it would take a few months to resolve the issue and get Swier back on the disability designation, the couple was later told that, due to congressional office inquiries, it might now take six to eight months to correct the problem.

Im willing to take my leg off and set it on someones desk if it would speed the process, Swier said. Meanwhile, we wait.

Swier may never have enlisted a more passionate partner for his latest battle than his fiance, a mother of five who still has three kids at home. Shes told others of their problems on several social media outlets and said she was most concerned about her future husband, who made a commitment to his country and was being disrespected and humiliated by a government that is now not honoring its responsibilities to him.

I understand systems dont always work, but the lack of humanity, compassion and care has been the most painful part, Bridget said. My soon-to-be husband took an oath, and in turn, the government made an oath to him."

She said she will continue to fight for Swier and his hard-earned benefits.

Maybe Im someone who thinks they can change the world, but Im just hoping this will change something, she said of their combined battle with the Social Security bureaucracy.

Throughout their recent struggles, both federal and financial, Bridget said she has come to adore the man she met at a VFW meeting a year ago and whom she will marry Aug. 5 in Pierre.

I love that even though he has seen the worst of the worst, he looks for the best and the beauty in everyone, she said. He is grateful for all he has and he is resilient. He has such a lack of bitterness, something I dont think I could carry in my heart. He is so incredibly loving, compassionate, intelligent and humble.

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Marshall said she wanted to thank Thune and Noems staffs for assistance, as well as members of the Combat Veterans Motorcycle Association for being there to assist Swier on his bad days.

Josh Crump, a retired Air Force serviceman who spent two tours in Afghanistan and now serves as executive officer for the 65-member Motorcycle Association in South Dakota, said hed become friends with Swier and had little doubt he remains 100 percent disabled.

Theres no question that Wayne is disabled. Ive ridden with him and I know hes disabled, Crump said. They wouldnt build him a home, ADA compliant, if he wasnt disabled.

Crump said he had encouraged Swier, a guy who would give you the shirt off his back, to call his congressional offices when he learned of his issues with Social Security.

The biggest thing with Waynes situation is, we come off the street, we volunteer to join the military and we basically write a check to the federal government telling them well do what you tell us to do and basically, in return, they need to take care of these servicemen and women, Crump said. But people sitting behind a desk are making these decisions, and theyre not helping anybody."

He said Swier has made a valiant sacrifice for his nation.

Waynes made a huge sacrifice, he added. We all signed up with the understanding we could get injured or killed, and were fine with that. But he gave up part of his brain and his leg in service to our country.

Contacted Thursday about Swiers issue, Sen. Thunes office cited privacy concerns related to constituent complaints in which the senators office is involved, but a representative encouraged those with similar issues to contact the senator's office.

My offices in South Dakota and Washington, D.C., are frequently contacted by people from around the state, Thune said in an email statement sent to the Journal. Fortunately, the professional and dedicated staff members who work on behalf of all South Dakotans are well-trained in handling a variety of cases, and they are committed to assisting people when they encounter problems with federal agencies or federally funded programs.

Meanwhile, a manager in the Rapid City Social Security office, who asked not to be named, said Thursday he would personally look into Swiers complaints and call the disabled veteran that day.

I honestly would like to look at the case itself, because there could be so many factors and so many things come into play, he said. I wouldnt want to speculate, but I would like to call him, Id like to review his records and see if we can get this straightened out.

Noting that Social Security has special processing for wounded warriors, the administrator referred further questions to the agencys press office. Later on Thursday, he asked that questions about Swiers case be put in writing, which they were.

As of Friday afternoon, the Journal had not received answers from the agency to the queries it had provided a day earlier.

But Swier did receive a call from Social Security on Thursday afternoon to confirm his status as 100 percent disabled. The representative said the agency had received his medical files, which total more than 8,000 pages, and had his case under review.

I think they will continue to make us play the waiting game, Swier said following the call. Its out of my hands. Im not in control of this. I just need to play their game and ride the wave.

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For disabled vet, battle rages on as feds deny disability payments - Rapid City Journal

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Trail Camera Trophies: Velvet deer, turkeys photographed on Topekan’s property – Topeka Capital Journal

Posted: August 6, 2017 at 5:43 am

For quite some time, I had been posting submitted photographs of deer, turkeys and other animals captured on trail cameras to my Rouse Outdoors blog on CJOnline.

Ive come to the realization that they are more likely to be seen by outdoors enthusiasts if they are listed in the actual Outdoors section of our website, so Im going to be running them as regular columns from now on with the header Trail Camera Trophies. Ill likely post some of the photographs in the print section, as well, so keep your eyes peeled for some great, candid shots of natures delights.

I received several great photographs recently from Dale Hossfeld, a longtime reader who frequently sends me trail camera photos and video he captures on his property in Topeka. This time, he sent a few photos of a velvet buck he snapped on his digital camera, instead.

The deer is seen wandering around near a piece of lawn art that you may have seen in some of his other photographs, and in one of the photos you can see the heads of two turkeys that appear to be photobombing the buck.

The velvet seen on this bucks antlers is actually a hairy skin that covers antlers as they grow in each spring and summer. The antlers are full of nerves and blood vessels, so this helps protect the spongy antlers before the deers testosterone begins to increase toward the end of the summer, causing the antlers to harden. The bucks will begin to shed their velvet by scraping their antlers against trees, which they do year-round regardless of whether theyre in velvet or not. The hard antlers will remain through the end of the breeding season before falling off, or being shed, in the winter or early spring. The cycle then starts all over again, with deer beginning to grow their velvety antlers again toward the middle or end of spring.

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Trail Camera Trophies: Velvet deer, turkeys photographed on Topekan's property - Topeka Capital Journal

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Your Good Health: Testosterone shots have drawbacks – Times Colonist

Posted: July 9, 2017 at 1:45 am

Dear Dr. Roach: I am a 70-year-old man. I receive testosterone injections (in the butt) from my provider every three weeks, and have been receiving these injections for roughly five years. My provider reviews my bloodwork every six months before he writes a prescription renewal for testosterone, which I then take to his office for safekeeping and the regular injections. My latest bloodwork indicates that my testosterone serum is low at 310, and free testosterone is low at 4.9. After five years of injections, I continue to have low T; it does not seem to be improving. At my most recent visit, the doctor increased the injection dosage from 2 ml to 3 ml. I am concerned because of the heart, prostate and other risk factors I read about. Any advice or cause for concern?

M.M.

Testosterone treatment is indicated for men with symptoms of low testosterone levels and confirmed by blood testing. It is not a tonic to be used without due consideration.

There has long been concern about adverse effects of testosterone, especially to the prostate and to the heart. Most prostate cancer is testosterone-sensitive, and removing testosterone was one of the oldest treatments for prostate cancer.

However, restoring normal levels of testosterone in a man with low levels is now considered to have low potential for increasing prostate cancer. It has not been definitively proven to be safe, but the many studies that have been done have been reassuring.

Authorities recommend more-aggressive prostate cancer screening for men on testosterone treatment.

Athletes using extremely high doses of testosterone (many times greater than the doses you are taking) are at risk for heart attack and stroke. However, these data cannot be used to consider the risk in men who are prescribed testosterone with a low level, where the goal is to get to normal. Testosterone treatment reduces several key risk factors, including cholesterol. Most of the well-done studies show little if any risk from testosterone treatment; some have shown benefit.

Since the dose you were getting wasn't bringing your blood level up, I think increasing it is appropriate. The usual goal is a blood level of 500-600, but that may not be appropriate for everybody.

Dear Dr. Roach: I am perplexed about use of estrogen ointment. My doctor has prescribed Premarin ointment to be used vaginally for relief of painful intercourse. It is effective, but I am very concerned about side- effects. She has assured me that the amount that is used (twice a week) is minimal and does not put users at risk for the side-effects of oral estrogen tablets. I have family history of blood clots and uterine cancer, and I suffer from aura migraines. I am 65 and in good general health. I never considered the use of hormones for menopausal symptoms, and although I am using the ointment at present, I still am very hesitant.

A.M.H.

Because estrogen is poorly absorbed when used topically, the concerns about side-effects are greatly reduced. Estrogen blood levels are very nearly the same in women on vaginal estrogen compared with women who do not use estrogen at all. While I would never prescribe vaginal estrogen to a woman with a history of breast cancer without discussing it with her oncologist, I think that the systemic risks of estrogen are very small with the vaginal preparations.

Dr. Roach regrets that he is unable to answer individual letters, but will incorporate them in the column whenever possible. Readers may email questions to ToYourGoodHealth@med.cornell.edu.

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Your Good Health: Testosterone shots have drawbacks - Times Colonist

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Charice’s journey to becoming transman Jake Zyrus – Inquirer.net

Posted: July 9, 2017 at 1:44 am

When he looks back at old videos of himin dainty dresses and belting out power balladshe does not see himself, but a different person.

Its like watching my little sister, quipped recording artist Jake Zyrus, who was previously known as Charice.

But the 25-year-old singer, who announced his new name in social media last June 20, isnt out to completely erase Charice from his life. According to Jake, hes simply letting her go to give way for the person he has been all along.

Changing his name was just one of the early steps in his journey as a transmanin his journey toward becoming complete.

He had his breasts surgically removed in March, and has been taking testosterone shots since April. And the effects were quite apparent when we sat down with him recently for an interview: He now has a hint of mustache; his voices tone has gone deeper. And these excited him.

If theres one song that would encapsulate what hes feeling right now, it would be Rascal Flatts Im Moving On. At last, I can see life has been patiently waiting for me, Jake began to sing, his voice still as beautiful as ever. And I know there are no guarantees, but Im not alone.

Jakes interview with the Inquirer:

Did it feel like it was the right time to do this? I just went with the flow, as always. I had to wait, because I knew it wasnt going to be easy. What I was sure of, though, was that I wanted to present the real me the next time I stepped onstage.

You first came out as a lesbian in 2013. I came out as a lesbian back then, because I was still worried about revealing who I really wasa transgender. People knew of being gay or lesbian, but not necessarily other gender identities. Now it seems like people are starting to recognize that the LGBTQ community is diverse.

What inspired you to come out as a transman? What pushed me was seeing other people having a hard time telling the world who they truly are. Theyre the reason why I did thisaside from personal reasons, of course.

How did you come up with Jake Zyrus? Ive always liked the name Jake. And I wanted to have two names, because why not? So I chose Zyrus.

Are you planning to make this name change official? Its a screen name for now, but the fact that people are calling me by that name is a big deal for me as a transman. I hope to eventually change my name officially, but not anytime soonthats a complicated process. Id choose a different name, if that time ever comes.

Some people made fun of your name. At times I feel its unfair. Ginusto ko to, so I dont have the right to complain.

How do you deal with the negativity? Im used to the issues. My life has been an open book. Much has been said about me, but Im still here, standingand Im a very sensitive person. You cant expect everyone to welcome you with open arms.

I had my breasts removed on March 29. I have also been taking testosterone shots. The first was on April 19 Jake Zyrus SingerPhoto by Lyn Rillon

Speaking of which, your grandmother didnt take it very well. What I did wasnt simple. So I expected that reaction; I understood.

The difference, I think, is that my life is public, everything becomes a big deal. But, were not much different from other families. We all go through challenges. I just hope we could resolve it privately.

Hows your relationship with your mother? Im happy she accepts the whole thing.

How are you and Alyssa Quijano after your breakup? We dont talk anymore, but our separation was amicable; the decision was mutual. We just realized that our relationship wasnt working anymore.

Aside from your name, are there other changes? I had my breasts removed on March 29. I have also been taking testosterone shots. The first was on April 19; next month I will have another.

Was it a tough decision? Were you afraid of going under the knife? I wasnt afraid I was excited. I knew what I wanted, so there were no buts and doubts. My mind was already made up.

Were you uncomfortable with the body you had. Im a man. But I was insecure about my breasts, my body. I wanted to act like a man, to sit like a man.

And the tone of your voice has gotten deeper? It sounds a bit different, but it wont negatively affect my voice.

The vocal abilities will remain intact. I hope so!

What do you think of Charice? I feel like shes a different person. I dont want to totally erase her from my life. When I watch my old videos, I just see her as a little sister. I dont regret anything I have been through as Charicebut it was hard. I was being someone Im not. But Im proud of her achievements.

Some people jokingly say that Charice is dead. Shes not dead; I just let her go. Shes free.

So back then, while you were making people happy with your talent, it wasnt the case for you. I dont want to be dramatic, but thats true. Theyre happy, but deep inside, its breaking you.

Do you get offended when people call you Charice? When somebody calls me, Charice, maam or she, I just think that they either have a different set of beliefs or they arent aware. Or, they just want to insult you.

As a celebrity transman, do you feel like you now have a responsibility to educate people? I dont want to impose, or force people to accept who we are. And so, should I speak about being a transman, it would be about making people in similar situations [feel] that theyre not alone.

In your last album, Catharsis, you went pop-rock. Do we expect more of that? Ill just let myself fly. I still love alternative rock, and I was heartbroken when Chris Cornell (of Soundgarden) died. I have been singing different genres all my life. Now, Im exploring again, experimenting with my voice.

What are you most excited about being Jake? The music Im going to do. And of course, when people call me Jake.

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Do Testosterone Shots Hurt? Guy On TRT Explains – YouTube

Posted: September 27, 2015 at 9:47 pm

Please SHARE, LIKE, COMMENT, and even FAVORITE THIS VIDEO if you found it useful or if you know somebody who it may benefit. Thank you. My Story

My name is Noah and on May 18 2011, I had a rare reaction to a vaccine called VIVITROL and consequently spiraled into a major, agitated, suicidal depression with depersonalization. I lost 25 lbs in 4 weeks and was in full panic or near panic for 8 weeks straight mixed with the darkest most painful depression I cold have ever imagined. I immediately could not work and had to move in with my parents who along with many siblings and friends had to watch me 24/7 as I was so suicidal. I was eventually hospitalized. Getting through each day seemed truly unbearable and I knew I would surely die. I have been put on many many different SSRI's SNRI's Tricyclics, Mood stabilizers, anti psychotics, holistic meds, acupuncture and even a form of shock therapy called RTMS. I barely saw any improvement in my condition for a full year. It was decided I had treatment resistant depression and I spent nearly every moment in tears. Weeks after starting my newest round of medications (Seroquel & Nortryptaline) as a last ditch effort, I had my blood drawn for possible hormone imbalances and my Testosterone levels came back 200 ng/Dl and 150 ng/Dl. The average 25 year old male has 750 ng/Dl. With this discovery I for the first time had any type of possible explanation as to why I was not getting better and why I might be so so sick. The symptoms of such Low T are very similar to those of major depression. I started Testosterone replacement therapy soon after and have been checking in with the world and documenting my experience with treatment as well as giving my insight and perspective on various topics of mental health. I am blessed to say that I have slowly, over the last year and 4 months, been improving and becoming more stable which I never thought to be possible. My low T manifested itself in the form of Major depression, anxiety, and depersonalization/ derealization for over a year. Gaining some mental stability back is nothing short of a miracle as I was near death for what felt like forever. I do not consider myself to be totally healed yet but I am closer now then ever before and aim to use what I have been through to help or at least offer support to others in need.

I was able to successfully come off my Seroquel and Pamelor.

I work out all the time as a part of my mental health recovery!!! Weight training and all kinds of cardio rule much of my free time!

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